Part II: Creating Space
by Jim Lewis
They’re my favorite moments in youth ministry . . .
“Kairos” moments, when, in the midst of a passing instant, an opening appears.
Someone nervously speaks up, vulnerably sharing a difficult life circumstance, a risky question or long-held secret. The room pauses, time stops and then . . . a collective sigh of release as each of us suddenly realizes we are not alone. Without a change in circumstance, an answer to the question or an immediate solution, everything has changed! The Breath of God has swept in and through us, creating a deep sense of connection, belonging, hope and trust.
The experience of connection and belonging is truly powerful! It’s in our DNA, created in the image of God (“Imago Dei”) and is central to God’s design for wholeness and life. Connection and belonging reduce stress, improve physical and emotional health and empower resilience through life’s most difficult challenges. They are the heart of the gospel and the soul of Jesus’ greatest commandment.
Trauma strikes at the core of connection and belonging, leaving a person feeling isolated and alone. In my first article, Becoming Aware, we explored the roots of trauma and its impact upon a person, often unconsciously. We established the vital importance of compassionately recognizing the signs and symptoms of trauma in those with whom we minister.
Ministering from a place of awareness, the value of CREATING SPACE seeks to transform experiences of isolation into ones of connection and belonging. Learning from our creation story, we know that the only thing labeled “not good” was the state of being alone (Genesis 2:18). From that moment forward, the primary thread through all of Scripture is God’s desire for us to experience connection again—ultimately leading Christ, through his death and resurrection, to destroy the power of anything that might threaten our Imago Dei connection reality, “Christ in you, the hope of glory” (Colossians 1:27).
Creating Space
Returning to the Parable of the Good Samaritan, the Samaritan CREATED SPACE in several distinct ways. First, he went to the wounded man. Though Samaritans and Jews did not associate, he crossed cultural boundaries to come close to the traumatized man. After bandaging the man’s wounds, the Samaritan didn’t just point him in the right direction, but he also walked with the man through those next steps. Then, the Samaritan advocated for the wounded man with further resources and support, physically and relationally through the innkeeper.
Caring for the robbed man wasn’t just about physical needs but also emotional, relational and spiritual needs. The Good Samaritan addressed the wounded man’s Imago Dei (DNA) need for connection and belonging, which is our God-designed, deepest source for help, hope and healing!
The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) prescribes the following six key principles of a trauma-informed approach:
- SAFETY that allows for inclusion and protection, physically and relationally.
- TRUSTWORTHINESS & TRANSPARENCY that promotes authenticity, dignity and trust.
- PEER SUPPORT that offers companionship for those with lived experience of trauma.
- COLLABORATION & MUTUALITY that values and levels the gifts and strengths of all people.
- EMPOWERMENT that recognizes and strengthens every person’s gifts for ministry.
- CULTURAL, HISTORICAL & GENDER ISSUES that honors important and unique differences.
Dr. Warren Kinghorm, whose work centers on the role of faith communities in caring for persons with mental health concerns, offers this important wisdom: “Recovery can take place only within the context of relationships. It cannot occur in isolation. It’s deeply important for us to cultivate trauma-safe churches. But the church doesn’t just say to trauma survivors, “You’re safe here.” As important and necessary as that is, the church can also say, “We need you and you belong to Christ and you are sent safe in the body of Christ, sent to the world.” (from Light University, ”Foundations of Trauma Informed Care, Lesson 8 conclusion).
CREATING SPACE in our youth ministries means intentionally living into this value and SAMSHA’s six principles by:
- BECOMING AWARE that in every gathering, there are trauma survivors present.
- Implementing SYSTEMS and SAFEGUARDS that prevent people from being traumatized or retraumatized.
- REMEMBERING and TEACHING that Jesus was also a trauma survivor who identifies with and seeks to comfort those who are living with the impact of trauma.
- OPENLY DISCUSSING the reality of trauma in a way that offers opportunity for people to be known without simply opening their wounds further.
- INVITING trauma survivors into service and mission.
- PROMOTING trauma-safe churches and communities.
Trauma Safe Youth Ministry
One of the most practical ways I have experienced for CREATING SPACE is through the empowerment and training of youth and adult leaders. Often, equipping leaders focuses on things like event planning and teaching methods or learning about adolescent development and faith formation. While these are certainly helpful tools for our leaders, we often miss the most important part of Christ-centered leadership:practicing the skills of loving.
Lyle Griner, director of Peer Ministry Leadership, once said to me “We love to talk about love, sing about love, lead Bible studies and plan retreats about love, but we often miss the more important message: HOW TO LOVE!” When equipping leaders with an awareness of trauma-informed youth ministry, it is vital to go beyond information to the practical skills of caring for those we lead. This kind of leadership CREATES SPACE to experience and grow in the love of Christ.
For more than 30 years I have been using the skills of Peer Ministry as the primary resource to equip both student and adult leaders. I first experienced this equipping at the age of 14 through my own youth group, and it changed my life. Without question, I utilize Peer Ministry skills every day, everywhere and in every relationship. Skills like:
- Welcoming someone new and initiating friendship.
- Learning how to listen, encourage and empathize.
- Including those who feel different or who are often not included.
- Helping someone share their story or walk through a difficult decision.
- Becoming aware of and respecting our own and other’s values.
- How to practically pray with someone.
This is a sampling of what CREATING SPACE looks like, as we seek to empower others in accepting, including and embracing the history and gifts of all God’s children—helping everyone experience and grow in the healing and transforming love of Christ.
The next article, CRISIS RESPONSE, will consider how we can prepare to respond following a specific traumatic event (with an individual in our group, with our church or in our community).
Jim Lewis is a youth and family ministry graduate of the Lutheran Bible Institute. He has served full-time in congregational ministry for more than 30 years and is a board-certified Life Coach for Resiliency and Soul Care (soulrhythms.org). Jim is also a first responder, emergency service and mental health chaplain. He is a founding member of the Tennessee Disaster Mental Health Strike Team, on the Advisory Council for the Tennessee Suicide Prevention Network and a board member with Peer Ministry Leadership. Jim’s life mission is to walk with and care for people, especially those hurting or struggling, helping them recognize and receive Love, Strength and Hope in all the rhythms of life.
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